Adina Soclof, MS. CCC-SLP is a certified Speech Pathologist. She received her master's degree from Hunter College in New York in Communication Sciences. She works as a Parent Educator for Bellefaire Jewish Children's Bureau facilitating "How to Talk so Kids will Listen and Listen so Kids will Talk" workshops as well as workshops based on “Siblings Without Rivalry.” Adina developed TEAM Communication Ventures and conducts parenting, teacher and clinician workshops via telephone nationwide. Adina lives with her husband and four lively children in Cleveland, Ohio. You can visit her at website at www.parentingsimply.com.
My husband and I, way back when, were told in our premarital counseling session that when were in the throes of a disagreement we should avoid starting our sentences with “You never…” “You never take out the garbage!” We were told that “You never…” sounds like an accusation and puts people on the defensive. This can take
In the past couple of parshas we read about Moshe, Aaron and Miriam caring for one another and working together. It is a beautiful example of what siblings can do if they get along! Unfortunately, as most parents know, siblings don’t always get along. Most siblings fight; they roughhouse, tease and belittle each other. In
Dear Adina, I am trying to incorporate some of the new parenting skills but my husband undermines me. He is not on board at all. I find it very frustrating and I get really irritated with him. What should I do? Thank you so much for your question. I get this a lot from Moms. Here are
A recent letter I received: I have two daughters very close in age, about a year a part. The younger one, Sara, adores her older sister and copies everything she does—her hair, her clothing, what she reads, etc. She loves to play with her and her friends. Rachel, the older one, wants nothing to do Sara. She ignores
I am not sure why but we often put a negative spin on our children’s behavior. One such example always come to mind: the child who throws their food or toys off their highchair is being naughty or “just doing it to make us mad.” In college I learned something that has stayed with me
Thanksgiving is here. Gratefulness is very much a Jewish trait. Jew in Hebrew is yehudi, which comes from the Hebrew word lehodot, which means to thank. A Jew starts their day by reciting the prayer of Modeh Ani, thanking G-d for a new day and a fresh start. Thankfulness and gratefulness are traits we need
This week’s parsha brings to light a recurring theme in Sefer Bereshit—sibling rivalry. We have seen it before with Kayin and Hevel, Yitzchak and Yishmael and now again with Yaakov and Esav. We all know the famous saying, “maaseh avot siman l’banim,” (the actions of the forefathers are a symbol or sign for the children).
When I first read Faber and Mazlish’s book, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen, I found the chapter on praise to be eye-opening. The authors cautioned parents to stop using evaluative praise and to use descriptive praise instead. Now I am reading another book on developing a growth mindset in our kids. Author Carol Dweck explains the differences
I know that when my children become defiant, my initial reaction is to lash out at them and get really angry. “How dare they!” I think. “After all I do for them, this is the way they talk to me?” My thoughts can go even further downhill, “I’ll make them do as I say! I’ll
In Parshat Lech Lecha, G-d tells Avraham to “Go from your land, from your birthplace and from your father’s house, to the land which I will show you.” Rashi says on this Pasuk: From your land: Now had he not already gone out of there with his father and come as far as Haran? Rather,