Adapted by Channie Koplowitz Stein
As part of the Yom Kippur liturgy, we go through the aleph bet, confessing to an entire litany of sins. Near the end, we confess to sins we have sinned before You bekalus rosh/through light headedness. Obviously, in this context, light headedness does not refer to a physical state, but rather to a mental or emotional state. As ArtScroll explains, the term refers to frivolousness, to not giving proper weight to situations and ideas, often leading to disrespect and mockery. As Rabbi Meislish explains, a major example is making jokes or having improper conversations during shul.
Rabbi Mattisyahu Salomon zt”l focuses specifically on the sin of speaking during the chazan’s repetition of the Shemoneh Esrai. This is the only sin for which the Shulchan Aruch says, “Gadol avoni minso/my sin is too great for You to bear,” too great to be forgiven. Cain, who used this expression to ask Hashem’s forgiveness after killing his brother, received atonement with punishment; talking during chazorat haShat”z does not. This understanding seems to be later validated by Rabbi Yom Tov Lippman [Tosfos Yom Tov] who lived through the cataclysmic era of the Chmielnicki pogroms of 1648-49. In a dream, he was told that the reason for the calamity was that people talked in shul during chazorat hashat”z.
Rabbi Salomon explains the logic behind this punishment for a seemingly minor infraction. Certainly, as the tragedies were unfolding, Jews flocked to the synagogue to pray to Hashem with serious, heartfelt entreaties. In contrast, when times were good, they did not take prayer seriously, thereby undermining the power of prayer. Now, when they needed the power of prayer, the Jews were left defenseless.
As the shul is a mikdosh me’at, representing the Beit Hamikdosh, when we are not respectful in its presence, we are, by extension, being disrespectful of the Beit Hamikdosh. How can we then seriously ask Hashem to rebuild the Beit Hamikdosh? Let us be more mindful of our shul behavior, our early arrival and leaving only after the full conclusion of the service, suggests Rabbi Sorotzkin. Every time we perform a mitzvah, we are connecting with Hashem, and need to be respectful and mindful. Every time we recite a blessing, pause to contemplate and respect.
This respect should be maintained at other times that God’s shechinah/Presence manifests itself among us, specifically during the recitation of the wedding blessings adds Rabbi Zinner in Nitei Gavriel.
The counter to kalus rosh is koveid rosh, literally, a heavy head. But this too is not meant physically, but spiritually, related to kavod, respect and dignity. We must serve Hashem with dignity by putting the head first. The head is the uppermost part of us, where the spirit and the neshamah reside. As we say daily in Adon Olam, Rabbi Yossi Cohen quoting R. Lopian zt”l points us, when we put our ruach/spirit at the head, controlling the guf/body, Hashem is with me and I have nothing to fear.
When haneshamah loch vehaguf loch/ the neshamah and the guf/body are in sync in service to Hashem, then the body belongs to Him, continues Rabbi Cohen quoting the Dover Shalom zt”l, and we ask Hashem to act for the glory of His Name. But when haneshamah loch vehaguf po’oloch, the guf wants to act independently, when it does not want to serve Hashem, not to be His, it is only Hashem’s handiwork. In that case, we ask Hashem, “Chusah/have mercy on Your handiwork.” Our goal is always to keep the head, the neshamah, as the heavy, controlling aspect over the body. As Rebbetzin Smiles often tells us, our head, our spirit, must have the keys that drive the cars of our bodies; we must not relinquish them to the childish, immature whims of the body.
Therein lies the difference between a tzadik and a rasha, writes Rabbi Yechezkel Levenstein zt”l. The evil, Haman, Yerovom, a naval/scoundrel/villain speaks blibo/in his heart, while the righteous, Chanah, Esther, David speak el libo/to his heart, with the mind and the spirit in control, not the particular desire of the time.
Rabbi Weissblum records the experience of Rabbi Yerucham Levovitz zt”l whose windows faced the university. He noted that the students, young men and women, before entering the building, would busy themselves with their hair and other appearances. This involvement with externals undoubtedly entered the halls of education with them. Nevertheless, it did not prevent them from becoming doctors and professors. Therefore, our Sages tell us that chochmah begoyim ta’amin/we can believe there is wisdom among the gentiles. However, this behavior would not be tolerated in a beis medrash where such frivolous concerns that could easily lead to lustful behavior between the sexes would not be tolerated. Therefore, Torah bagoyim al ta’amin/do not believe there is Torah among the gentiles.
Light-headedness and frivolousness lead to all kinds of negative behavior. Just as your head is at the top of your body, so must you elevate your thoughts to the highest places, especially during davening.
Perhaps this explains why Man stands upright, facing forward and upward, while animals are generally horizontal, facing downward toward the earth, suggests Rebbetzin Smiles in Arise: Aspire. For animals are always concerned with their physical survival, while mankind must aspire to a higher existence. We must train ourselves not to need instant gratification, not to respond reflexively to outside stimuli, like Pavlov’s dogs.
To live this way requires mindfulness, writes Dr. Feiner. And mindfulness requires taking the time to pause and reflect. Pharaoh understood this mechanism. Therefore, he enslaved every moment of the lives of Bnei Yisroel with difficult work that would leave no time for thought or reflection. Take the time to reflect not only on your actions, but also on the motivation to your behavior, to be an eved Hashem. When we do have leisure to think, make a point of accepting “the yoke of Heaven,” to prevent the frivolity that leads to licentiousness. As Rabbi Aaron Soloveitchick zt”l writes in Logic of the Heart, Logic of the Mind, true simchah, joy from the heart, is antithetical to external joviality and hilarity.
Hashem looks down from heaven and judges us constantly, not just at the end of our life or only on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. We must always feel the “I have set Hashem beside me always,” writes Rabbi Mintzberg zt”l the Ben Melech. [Hashem tzilcha/Hashem is your shadow, always with us. CKS]
Mitzvah observance should not be rote behavior, but thoughtful and focused on obeying Hashem’s command and wishes. Hopefully, I usually enjoy mitzvah observance. But the reason I observe the mitzvah is because it is Hashem’s command, even when it is challenging, writes Rabbi Wolbe zt”l.
On the flip side, a chet, translated as sin, actually means “missing the mark.” When we sin, we have strayed from the path because we have forgotten our purpose of bringing Hashem’s presence and kavod/honor into the world. We have strayed from the goal, and teshuvah is the desire to return to this path. As Rebbetzin Smiles says, if you don’t know your destination, you will never get there. Our destination is to return to our true selves and our connection to Hashem.
What keeps us from proper davening? Some of the main barriers to effective davening are sadness and laziness, writes Rabbi Friedlander zt”l, the Sifsei Chaim quoting the Mishnah in Brachot. These drag us down to the lowest levels that keep our minds wandering aimlessly to empty thoughts, thoughts appearing in our minds lightly, without substance. A mind that is filled with spiritual values is heavy with substance, remains focused, and doesn’t wander. Fill your mind with the joy that comes from the substance and of the essence of your mitzvah and your tefillah; there will be no room left for frivolous thoughts to enter and disturb your prayers.
How much of our service and observance is merely a matter of rote, empty, without focus? A life without a sense of focus and responsibility has no past and no future. A “heavy head,” focused on the sanctity of NOW, giving purpose to life, writes Rav Eisman zt”l. It is for this reason that at the end of the complete Yom Kippur service, the Kohein Gadol was again required to change his clothes and enter the Kodesh Kodoshim to remove the empty incense pans, for there is no place for emptiness, things without substance, in sacred places. This is true both of physical sanctuaries and sanctuaries of the mind.
Hashem gifted mankind with minds that can think and reason. Let us thank Him by filling our minds with thoughts of substance, of sanctity, of connection to Him so that we do not sin through light-headedness.
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