Many Jewish singles, frustrated with the process of going out on blind dates, scouring the personal ads and frequenting the usual "scenes" – only to meet people with whom they cannot communicate, have nothing in common, or just don't like – often lament that they will never find their true bashert (perfect match). But for Jewish deaf singles, especially those who live in communities or countries where there are few Jewish people, it’s even harder to find someone who speaks their language – literally.

Growing up in Ireland, Deborah had one Jewish deaf friend – the only other Jewish deaf person she knew. On a visit to the U.S. in the early 1980's, she stayed at the home of Samuel and Rachelle Landau, a deaf married couple who will celebrate their 25^th anniversary in March.. The Landaus often serve as matchmakers for other deaf Jews and– together with the OU – maintain the Jewish Deaf Singles Registry (JDSR), a program that provides a host of services for the Jewish deaf community in America and around the world.

In 1990, when Deborah received a JDSR mailing about what was to be one of its first annual social events, she planned another vacation to the U.S. It was at this gathering that she met Barry from Brooklyn. After two years of dating by mail, Barry traveled to Ireland to meet Deborah's family and Deborah flew to New York to meet Barry’s parents. Once Deborah moved to America, it was only a few months before Barry proposed and she accepted. Today, the couple, who communicates by using both sign language and oral speech, lives on Long Island with their two hearing sons, four-year-old Michael and two-year-old Jonathan.

Now an annual mid-February tradition, the JDSR singles event continues to draw men and women not only from communities in the New York metropolitan area but also from lands as far away as Australia, Israel and France. "People fly in for our events simply because there's nothing else," said Mr. Landau. This year’s singles event will be held on Sunday, February 13, from 12:00-5:00 p.m., at the Jewish Educational Center (JEC), 330 Elmora Avenue, in Elizabeth, NJ.

"Ninety percent of deaf people marry deaf people, but there are only about 10,000 Jewish deaf people in the world. It is a very limited population," said Rabbi Eliezer Lederfeind, founder and director of Our Way, the Orthodox Union’s program for the Jewish deaf and hard of hearing. "In many aspects of their life, including their choice of spouse, the Jewish deaf person is constantly confronted with the question, ‘Am I Jewish or deaf first?’ Many choose the latter."

That is why intermarriage – which has reached epidemic proportions in the greater Jewish community – is even more prevalent among deaf Jews, who are a minority within a minority. Mr. Landau explains that the JDSR aims to combat this situation, "not by preaching to young people to marry Jewish, but by helping them to marry Jewish."

For $10 a year, subscribers to the registry – who must be at least 18 years old and who must be Jewish according to Jewish law – receive an anonymous ID number and can prepare a brief description of their background, hobbies, level of religious observance, appearance, qualities sought in a mate and method of communication (American Sign Language, oral, etc.).

These descriptions are published, along with articles of interest to the deaf community, in a newsletter that is sent to JDSR members around the globe. Readers select from the profiles and write to those who pique their interest. All correspondence is forwarded confidentially through the OU.

The annual winter singles event provides an opportunity for long-time pen-pals to finally meet face-to-face and it allows people who haven’t yet been involved with the JDSR to see that there really are other Jewish deaf singles out there. Smaller local events are held throughout the year and for the fall, a first-ever, Labor Day weekend JDSR retreat in Silver Spring is in the works.

Membership in the registry is open to the never married, divorced and widowed – all year long. Pre-registration for the February 13th event is $12 for members and $15 for non-members; at the door, $16 for members and $20 for non-members. For more information, please contact the Landaus via TTY/Fax at 908.352.7395, or email sammuellandau@juno.com.

Our Way, established in 1969, is currently the only organization reaching out to Jews across the country who are deaf and hard of hearing, bridging the gap between the hearing and non-hearing worlds. Through a vast array of programs including holiday celebrations, a deaf singles registry, Torah study groups, summer tours, family retreats, conventions and special signing publications, Our Way provides spiritual and social opportunities for nearly 1,000 Jewish deaf across the country.