{"id":53235,"date":"2016-02-25T12:21:40","date_gmt":"2016-02-25T17:21:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.ou.org\/life\/?p=53235"},"modified":"2016-03-03T12:08:17","modified_gmt":"2016-03-03T17:08:17","slug":"losing-second-son","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ou.org\/life\/israel\/losing-second-son\/","title":{"rendered":"Losing My Second Son"},"content":{"rendered":"

The following is an excerpt from Miriam’s Song<\/a> (Gefen\u00a0Publishing House,\u00a02016):<\/em><\/p>\n

\"MiriamI remember the exact time. Bat-El called from the army, we wished each other Shabbat shalom<\/em>, and with the phone in my hand, I banged my head on the door of the kitchen cabinet.<\/p>\n

I shouted to Bat-El on the phone: \u201cGod, I just hit my head really hard!\u201d and hung up at once.<\/p>\n

I clutched my head in my hands and continued to shout, \u201cGod, what a bruise! What a bruise!\u201d<\/p>\n

I sat down, hands holding my head, and burst into tears.<\/p>\n

Avihai and Elyasaf checked my head and said, astonished, \u201cMom, we can\u2019t see any bruise. We don\u2019t know what bruise you\u2019re talking about.\u201d<\/p>\n

But I kept wailing. I sat in the corner of the living room on the easy chair, under the photos of Uriel, grasping my head.<\/p>\n

Then I calmed down. I was sitting in the same chair in which I had sat when they came to tell me about Uriel. Suddenly, my neighbor Eti walked in. In a few minutes Shabbat would begin, Shabbat Hagadol, the Shabbat before Passover. Why was she coming to my house?<\/p>\n

I looked at her, and she looked at me, and we were both silent. Inside, my mind was churning: Why in the world was the neighbor coming to see me on this Friday afternoon? Didn\u2019t she have last-minute preparations to do before Shabbat Hagadol began?<\/p>\n

She told me about a certain problem, and I calmed her and said that everything would work out fine. Then, in a shocking outburst, without a word from her, I screamed at her: \u201cHave you come to tell me something? Did you want to tell me something about Eliraz?\u201d<\/p>\n

I have no idea why I said that to her. Mother\u2019s intuition, I guess.<\/p>\n

\u201cEliraz is wounded,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n

\"Miriam%27s\u201cThank God!\u201d I said. \u201cWounded.\u201d Like one possessed, I rose from the easy chair to get dressed and go to the hospital. I never imagined that at the top of the stairs outside, just a few yards away, the street was already full of people.<\/p>\n

\u201cI know,\u201d I said, without being asked. \u201cEliraz is wounded. I\u2019m getting dressed. Do you by chance know which hospital he\u2019s in?\u201d<\/p>\n

No one answered. Instead, everyone gave me strange looks.<\/p>\n

I tried calling Liat, the contact officer for wounded soldiers, but she didn\u2019t answer.<\/p>\n

I tried calling Eliraz, but he didn\u2019t answer.<\/p>\n

I called a few other people in my cellphone contact list, but no one answered. Hadas was the only one who answered, and she said she was checking into what had happened to Eliraz. But Hadas already knew, and she was on her way to tell Shlomit.<\/p>\n

Something was tearing at my heart. Why wouldn\u2019t anyone answer me?<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with everyone!\u201d I shouted.<\/p>\n

Then Avihai came in. He had gone to immerse himself in the mikveh<\/em> before Shabbat, and someone had called him. Apparently he already knew.<\/p>\n

\u201cSit down, Mom,\u201d he said. \u201cSit down. They\u2019re checking into what\u2019s happened to Eliraz.\u201d<\/p>\n

At that moment, my legs turned into stone. I kept repeating, \u201cEliraz is wounded, Eliraz is wounded.\u201d I repeated this out loud, even though deep inside, I knew that he was dead. It was like I had two minds. One knew the truth, while the other tried to hold on to hope, to illusion.<\/p>\n

I prayed to the Holy One, blessed be He, to take me to him.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy Eliraz is alive. My Eliraz can\u2019t die. Eliraz\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed one of our friends, who was then inside the house, peeking outside. I realized he was waiting for the military representatives to come to inform me. Then, like a crazy woman, I ran to the front door, locked it, ran to the back door, and locked it securely as well. I closed all the blinds, and shrieked, \u201cNo one\u2019s coming inside this house, and no one\u2019s leaving, either!\u201d<\/p>\n

I stood before the photo of Eliezer that hangs in the entranceway, and wailed, \u201cWhat have you done to Eliraz! You went up there in order to protect him! I\u2019m here, down here, to watch over all the rest!\u201d I kicked the wall with all my might.<\/p>\n

Then I went back to the easy chair and collapsed into it. I knew, and I didn\u2019t know. I didn\u2019t know, and I knew.<\/p>\n

At five thirty, after Shabbat had already begun, when the military representatives arrived, they found the table set for Shabbat, down to the white tablecloth, and the house ready and kosher for Passover. \u201cThis is an ordinary house!\u201d I shouted. \u201cA normal house! One family can\u2019t lose two sons! Why, God?! Why me?!\u201d<\/p>\n

They stood before me, and I closed their lips with my fingers. I begged, \u201cDon\u2019t tell me. As long as you haven\u2019t said anything, my son is still alive.\u201d<\/p>\n

They tried to speak. After all, it\u2019s their job. I knew that the three angels had visited Abraham to announce that his wife Sarah would give birth to a son, while my three angels had come to inform me once again that I no longer had a son.<\/p>\n

\u201cMaybe you\u2019ve got the wrong address?\u201d I suggested. \u201cOr the wrong last name? It doesn\u2019t make sense for two sons from the same home, from the same family, to be killed.\u201d Not that I wanted another mother to receive the terrible news; I simply couldn\u2019t believe that such a disaster could take place.<\/p>\n

I wouldn\u2019t let them speak.<\/p>\n

\u201cMiriam,\u201d one of them said, trying to pull my hand away from his mouth. \u201cI have to do this.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPlease, tell me he\u2019s wounded,\u201d I wailed. \u201cGravely wounded\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Even when they read me the prepared text that they have to say, I screamed, \u201cI don\u2019t believe it!\u201d<\/p>\n

Then I called Shlomit, Eliraz\u2019s wife.<\/p>\n

\u201cShlomit,\u201d I said, \u201cThere are people here saying that something\u2019s happened to Eliraz. What\u2019s happened to him?\u201d<\/p>\n

Shlomit replied with words that I\u2019ll never forget: \u201cNow I\u2019m like you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo!\u201d I cried. \u201cYou won\u2019t be like me! You won\u2019t be a widow!\u201d<\/p>\n

Then I understood. My son Eliraz was no more.<\/p>\n

Miriam Peretz tragically lost two sons while they served in the IDF. She has become an Israeli national symbol of resilience and faith as she dedicates her time and energy to volunteer work. Miriam speaks in Israel and abroad, inspiring and strengthening others with her story of tragedy and determination to keep living. The newly published Miriam\u2019s Song<\/a> (Gefen Publishing House, 2016) is a translation of the Israeli bestseller which tells her life story. Miriam Peretz will be visiting NY under the auspices of the OU Israel and Gefen Publishing House from March 10 \u2013 March 17. For details on public events, click here.<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The following is an excerpt from Miriam’s Song (Gefen\u00a0Publishing House,\u00a02016): I remember the exact time. Bat-El called from the army, we wished each other Shabbat shalom, and with the phone in my hand, I banged my head on the door of the kitchen cabinet. I shouted to Bat-El on the phone: \u201cGod, I just hit<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":133182,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_cloudinary_featured_overwrite":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-53235","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-israel"],"yoast_head":"\nLosing My Second Son - OU Life<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.ou.org\/life\/israel\/losing-second-son\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Losing My Second Son - OU Life\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"The following is an excerpt from Miriam’s Song (Gefen\u00a0Publishing House,\u00a02016): I remember the exact time. 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