by Dr. Hinda Dubin
The tears in my eyes blur the words on my paper as I try to compose my thoughts about a truly remarkable life. I feel blessed to have known such an outstanding and exceptional person.
While Rabbi Hauer excelled in every aspect of his life, as an exemplary leader, family man, shul rabbi, powerful supporter of Israel, fierce combatant of antisemitism, mentor, and friend, what stood out to many of us was his profound love for Klal Yisroel. He cared about every person and had a special concern for those who are single, divorced, or widowed. In addition to being a congregant in Rabbi Hauer’s shul in Baltimore, I had the privilege of working with him on sensitive projects in my capacity as a psychiatrist. Over the years, there were many complex situations involving an intricate interface between psychosocial, spiritual, and behavioral health challenges. Rabbi Hauer compassionately and passionately attended to those needs, at times seeking collaboration from a psychological perspective.
There are so many beautiful and illustrative vignettes that come to mind but allow me to share three stories that highlight Rabbi Hauer’s sensitivity and wisdom as they relate to this population. The following stories are shared with permission. Names and identifying details have been changed.
One congregant’s newlywed daughter found herself in a difficult situation shortly after her marriage and realized that the marriage could not continue. Rabbi Hauer was involved from the beginning, guiding her throughout. He organized a meeting with Rav Shmuel Kamenetsky – and he did not stop there. Recognizing how intimidating and overwhelming such a meeting could be, he chose, on Tzom Gedalia, while fasting and during one of the busiest weeks for a pulpit rabbi, to travel with the family to Philadelphia so he could be right there with her, ensuring she had the support she needed.
Despite the heavy burden of carrying so many people’s pain, he always radiated strength and joy. Every year after Kol Nidrei, Rabbi Hauer would recite the special blessing normally given by parents to all the people in shul who did not have someone to bless them. It was a treasured and deeply poignant moment in many people’s lives. For those unable to be in shul to receive the bracha, Rabbi Hauer went to great lengths to meet with each person individually before Yom Tov, giving them this meaningful blessing and ensuring they entered Yom Kippur with a sense of comfort and belonging.
Another illustrative example involved a woman in the community who was going through a difficult divorce. In addition to the usual stresses of divorce, her former spouse was no longer observant and was unwilling to provide financial support for their child’s Jewish education. Rabbi Hauer made sure all her needs were met, offering regular guidance on navigating co-parenting with an irreligious spouse and, of course, covering the child’s tuition to ensure he received a strong Jewish education.
Rabbi Hauer was not content to act alone; he constantly spoke about the importance of looking out for others, and in doing so created a culture of people striving to emulate his kindness and sensitivity. My husband always went out of his way to make sure that widows were included at meals, weddings, shul events, and celebrations, something made possible only because of Rabbi Hauer’s unwavering support and encouragement.
Rabbi Hauer taught us that every heart counts and every soul matters. Truly, the heart and soul of Rabbi Moshe Hauer zt”l were intertwined with caring for every person in our beautiful community. Our hearts and souls are bereft. May we be inspired by his beautiful example to continue caring for the hearts and souls of our kehillah. יהי זכרו ברוך.
Dr. Hinda Dubin is a faculty member at Johns Hopkins Medical Institutions and the University of Maryland, a Founding Fellow of the Academy of Cognitive Therapy and a Distinguished Life Fellow of the APA.
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