Shabbat Shuva and Yom Kippur
Shabbat Shuva
Our Sages point out the significance of there being exactly seven days
between Rosh HaShana and Yom Kippur, exclusive. It means that there is one
and only one Sunday, one Monday... and exactly one Shabbat. And these unique
days become the templates, if you will, for their counterparts throughout
the coming year. The Wednesday of Aseret Y'mei T'shuva (the Ten Days of
Repentance) is (or rather, should be) the prototype for all the Wednesdays
of 5763. Same for the other days of the week. This idea is particularly
meaningful for Shabbat.
You know the saying. Today is the first
day of the rest of your life. Well, Shabbat Shuva is the first Shabbat of
the rest of your year (and life). And that presents a challenge. Use Shabbat
Shuva to help make all your Shabbats better and more special than they have
been in the past, for you and your whole family. (True, Rosh HaShana was the
first Shabbat this year, but it is too different a day to become the model
for "regular" Shabbatot. That's what Shabbat Shuva is for.)
Do you cut corners with the basic laws of
Shabbat? Do you do things on Shabbat that you know you really should not be
doing, but they seem trivial to you? If so, Shabbat Shuva is there for you.
Take things slowly, but make some forward progress. Decide not to turn
lights on and off this one Shabbat. Then see if you can keep it going for
one more Shabbat. And another. That was just an example. Let's say that you
are Shomer Shabbat.
And the answer to the question about
cutting corners is NO. You keep the Shabbat. You abstain from all manner of
Melacha, including all the Rabbinic restrictions. Good. But do you REALLY
keep Shabbat the way it should be kept? And honor it? And enjoy it? How do
you spend your "free" time on Shabbat? Do you have quality time with your
family? Do you invite guests regularly? Do you learn Torah and sing Zemirot
at the table? Are your discussions at the table on a level that honors the
Shabbat, or is it about baseball, the stock market, shopping, TV
commercials, and such?
Napping is good, but is that all there is? How about a leisurely walk with
your spouse and/or children? A family review of Parshat HaShavua? (using
ParshaPix, perhaps?)
And what about the preparation for
Shabbat? Is the day before Shabbat, Friday or Erev Shabbat, if you follow
the difference. The same thing goes for Saturday night or Motza'ei Shabbat.
Which do you have?
Shabbat Shuva is the Shabbat between Rosh
HaShana and Yom Kippur. It's a one-of-a-kind Shabbat. We each have our own
davening and thinking agendas for Rosh HaShana and Yom Kippur. But the
Shabbat between them is the challenge. People usually succeed in having a
special and meaningful Rosh HaShana and Yom Kippur. But those special days
come once a year. Shabbat is every single week. Use this first one to raise
your TSO (total Shabbat observance) a notch or two. Then work on maintaining
and improving your honor and joy of the most special and precious of days -
Shabbat.
Yom Kippur
Torah & Haftara
Torah reading for YK comes mostly from Parshat Acharei - 34 p'sukim of
Vayikra 16 for Shacharit (first Torah) and 30 p'sukim of Vayikra 18 for
Mincha. The Maftir (second Torah in the morning) is from Parshat Pinchas.
Here's a quick rundown.
Yom Kippur Morning
Two Sifrei Torah
6 people in the first (7 if YK is Shabbat, like next year)
The Torah's portion dealing with the Kohen Gadol and the Yom Kippur service
in the Beit HaMikdash. It is "repeated" (sort of) in the repetition of the
Musaf Amida. Mixed in with the Beit HaMikdash service are some aspects of
"our" Yom Kippur — especially the aspect of ATONEMENT. Perhaps it can be
summed up by saying that atonement does not depend upon the Beit HaMikdash,
but the Day itself, and what we do with it.
Kohen 1st Aliya 6 p'sukim 16:1-6
Levi 2nd Aliya 5 p'sukim 16:7-11
Shlishi 3rd Aliya 6 p'sukim 16:12-17
R'vi'i 4th Aliya 7 p'sukim 16:18-24
Chamishi 5th Aliya 6 p'sukim 16:25-30
Shishi 6th Aliya 4 p'sukim 16:31-34
(The 7th Aliya for Shabbat results from splitting the first Aliya in two)
Maftir (second Torah)5 p'sukim - Bamidbar 29:7-11
About the Musaf of Yom Kippur. The other korbanot of YK were dealt with in
the reading from the first Torah.
Haftara - 22 p'sukim Yeshayahu 57:14-58:14
The Haftara makes the point that fasting is a hollow observance without it
being accompanied by (or leading to) a change for the better in individuals
and society.
The last two p'sukim of the Haftara are the basis of the "flavor" of Shabbat
as shaped by Rabbinic law and custom.
Yom Kippur Mincha
(All other Mincha readings are either the "preview" of the coming Parshat
HaShavua - Shabbat afternoon - or Va'y'chal - fast day afternoons. This
one’s unique)
This last portion of Acharei Mot deals with the forbidden sexual relations
and activities. Avoidance of these prohibi- tions is an essential part of
that which is to make the Jew and the Jewish People holy. Thus, an
appropriate reading for Yom Kippur.
Kohen First Aliya 5 p'sukim 18:1-5
Levi 2nd Aliya 16 p'sukim 18:6-21(longest Aliya of the day)
Shlishi (Maftir) 9 p'sukim 18:22-30
Haftara - 48 + 3 p'sukim - The entire Book of Yonah; some communities add
Micha 7:18-20.
The High & the Low
The repetition of the Yom Kippur Musaf Amida contains two very powerful
sections that are said back-to-back. The two sections describe diametrically
opposite states of Jewish experience.
The first is the beautiful and detailed
description of the Yom Kippur service in the Beit HaMikdash by the Kohein
Gadol. Elaborating upon that which was read in the Torah a bit earlier, the
Chazan movingly describes the "order of the day", including the multitudes
who packed into the courtyard of the Beit HaMikdash to witness the events of
the day. The blessing of the Kohen Gadol for a good year for all, the
description of his countenance upon emerging from the Holy of Holies, the
celebration that followed - all portray the most glorious period of Jewish
History.
Immediately thereafter, the text plunges
us into a drastically different scene. We read of the Ten Martyrs who died
sanctifying G-d's Name. The details are heart-breaking, especially when seen
on the backdrop of the previous portion.
Why are these two opposite pictures of
Jewish History presented side by side?
On Yom Kippur, says the Rambam, one
should picture himself as precariously balanced, so that one mitzva will tip
the scale to the good - for himself, for his community, for all the world.
And one sin can, G-d forbid, tip the scale the other way.
The repetition of the Musaf Amida gives
us two glimpses into history, but also shows us the possible scenarios of
the future. Do we remain faithful to G-d, do we do more mitzvot, do we do
the mitzvot better, do we improve the interpersonal relations among Jews. Do
we do T'shuva. If so, we will soon reap the benefits of a complete spiritual
and physical Jewish Life in Eretz Yisrael. If we take the other path,
tragedy and horror await us. The Choice is ours.
Shofar at the Conclusion of Yom Kippur (from Sefer HaToda'a)
[1] It is commemorative of the Shofar blowing during Yom Kippur of Yovel
year in the time of the Beit HaMikdash. In fact, we learn our Shofar blowing
on Rosh HaShana from the Yom Kippur of Yovel. The Torah does not use the
word Shofar in context with Rosh HaShana. The Talmud draws for us the
parallel between the two T’RU'A sounds of Tishrei - Yom Kippur of Yovel,
where Shofar is mentioned, and Rosh HaShana, where it is only implied.
[2] The Shofar at this point confuses the Satan. During Yom Kippur, he had
no permission to accuse the People of Israel. As the day ends, he attempts
to resume his role as accuser of Israel, but is confounded by the sound of
the Shofar.
[3] The Shofar joyfully trumpets our triumph over the Satan, just as those
who return from successful battle will sound the Shofar.
[4] The Shofar calls to mind the Akeida (Binding of Isaac) at this moment of
the sealing of G-d's decrees.
[5] Just as we started blowing the Shofar on Rosh Chodesh Elul, to mark
Moshe Rabeinu's ascent of Mt. Sinai to plead on behalf of the People, so too
do we sound the Shofar at the conclusion of that 40 day period of Divine
Forgiveness and Atonement.
[6] The Shofar signifies the departure of the Divine Presence (SILUK HA-SH’CHINA)
that was with us throughout Yom Kippur. This reflects the pasuk "G-d ascends
with the Tru'a, HaShem with the sound of the Shofar."
[7] It marks the end of the fast and reminds us to feed the children who
have fasted. (Apparently, we don't need a reminder for ourselves.)
[8] It publicizes the sanctity of the evening folowing Yom Kippur, which we
shoud treat as a joyous festival. The Midrash says that following Yom
Kippur, a "Bat Kol" says "Go and eat your bread in joy."
BARUCH SHEM K'VOD MALCHUTO L'OLAM VA'ED
The well-known custom on Yom Kippur is to say Baruch Sheim K'vod Malchuto
L'Olam Va'ed aloud in the SH'MA, whereas it is usually said quietly.
First of all, the sentence is the only
part of Sh'ma that is not from the Torah. For that reason, it is generally
said quietly, to distinguish it from the rest of the Biblical passages.
There are two origins attributed to
Baruch Sheim. One says that it was Yaakov Avinu's whispered response of
thanks to G-d when his sons proclaimed their complete faith and loyalty to
G-d with the words: Hear Yisrael, G-d, our G-d, G-d is One.
The other source says that Moshe Rabbeinu
"borrowed" it from the angels and taught us to say it. Because the sentence
is not originally ours, we modestly whisper it throughout the year. On Yom
Kippur, however, when the nature of the day and its prohibitions elevate us
spiritually, we resemble angels and only then do we "dare" (so to speak) say
Baruch Sheim aloud.
This second origin for Baruch Sheim... seems to fit well with the Yom Kippur
practice.
There is, perhaps, another reason why we
say Baruch Sheim aloud on Yom Kippur. In the Beit HaMikdash, the sentence
Baruch Sheim... was used as the response to a bracha, rather than AMEN. On
YK, with its focus on the service in the Beit HaMikdash, we say the sentence
aloud. In the repetition of Musaf, we find the description of the response
of the people in the Azara (courtyard) to the Explicit Divine Name - they
fell to the ground, prostrated themselves and said Baruch Sheim K'vod
Mal'chuto L'Olam Va'ed.
One should say Baruch Sheim with deepfelt Kavana, especially at Ne'ila. It
is a very powerful six word statement.
The Kabbalisitc Secret of the Scapegoat on Yom Kippur, An in-print shiur in
memory of R' Pesach Moshe ben Efraim ZT"L
Tishrei 4, by Rabbi Efraim Sprecher, Dean of Students, Diaspora Yeshiva,
Jerusalem
Rambam in Moreh Nevuchim 3:46 sees the idea of the sa’ir which is sent away
as an action of arousing everyone to do teshuvah. According to him, “sins
are not burdens that one can transfer from the back of one person to that of
another, but all of these actions (regarding the sa’ir on Yom Kippur) are
all meant as lessons to bring about fear in one’s soul, until one does
teshuvah”.
The sa’ir which is sent away is meant as
a lesson to teach us that sins must be eradicated from within the borders of
Israel. Hashem gives sinners an opportunity to improve their ways and
demands that only sin be eliminated, not sinners.
The purpose of the sa’ir which is sent
away is to uproot various false beliefs from the heart, as in the verse,
“they shall not sacrifice their sacrifices to the sa’irim” (Vayikra 17:17).
The word AZ'AZEL is a composite of the words AZ and ZEL, and implies a great
and mighty denigration. The people see how the sa’ir is loaded up with all
the sins and is then thrown over a cliff where it is torn apart, and as a
result, they are all greatly overwhelmed and impressed by an appreciation of
how terrible it is to worship false gods, as symbolized by the sacrifices to
the sa’irim. The results of this action are that NASO ALAV ET KOL AVANOTAM,
“it shall carry upon itself all their sins”. The contamination of idol
worship leaves their souls and the people again cling to their Creator.
V'NATAN OTAM AL ROSH H'SE'IR And he shall
put them (the sins) on the head of the sa’ir (Vayikra 16:21) – means that
the sinner will abandon his sins and will from now on forsake sin, for the
word V'NATAN may be defined in the sense of separation. As to the verse
V'NASO A'VONOTAM AL HA'ARETZ G'ZEIRAH – “he will carry all their sins to a
wasteland” – this refers to the one who carries the sa’ir. He will carry on
his shoulders to a wasteland, A'VO'NATAM – the sa’ir - A'VO'NATAM has the
same use here as CHATAT – which means literally “sin”, but refers to the
goat. Ramban explains that the intention of the Torah was to separate the
people from idolatry, so that they should no longer offer their sacrifices
to the sa’irim.
He explains the sa’ir la’Azazel as an expression of scorn for idolatry and
sa’irim, and as educating the people to serve Hashem.
According to Kabbalah, the two sa’irim
are the two qualities of good and evil that were implanted in man so as to
give him free will. The GORAL – the lot – is his lot to choose between good
and bad. The one is to Hashem, as in the verse U'VA'CHARTA B'CHAIM – “choose
life” (Devarim 30:19), while the other is to Azazel.
The letters of the word AZ'AZ'EL form the
first letters (in different order) of the verse (Koheles 7:14),ZEH L'UMAT
ZEH ASAH (H)ELOKIM – “this as compared to this, Hashem created” – that both
goats must be identical in size and appearance. This comparison shows that
whatever exists in kedushah has a counterpart in tum'ah, and this is to
provide the even balance of good and evil which makes free will possible.
Yoma 67 states that the sa’ir that is
sent away is meant to atone for the sin of Uzza and Azazel, two angels who
came down to earth and became human, at the time of Na’amah, sister of Tubal
Cain, and who illicitly took married women for themselves (see Bereishis
6:1-4). That is why we read all the laws of forbidden marriages at the
afternoon service on Yom Kippur to remind us of that first corruption of
forbidden marriages, for which the sa’ir that is sent away comes to atone.
It may be that our atonement here is based on finding merit for ourselves,
by showing that even angels sinned and fell into the trap of sexual
immorality. What then can one say of the sins of man, who is but flesh and
blood?
The medrash in Devarim Rabbah, states
that Moshe Rabbeinu said to Hashem, “Master of the Universe, even angels
came and lusted for the women of the earth”. Why then blame your people, who
are but flesh and blood? This concept adds merit to the nation of Israel on
Yom Kippur.
From the Pull Out Section of the Hard Copy of TT
As Shrek said about ogres and onions, and as the Donkey said about parfaits,
so we say about Torah Tidbits Pull-Outs - they are made of layers. That's
what they are all about.
This YK Pull-Out contains some reading
material for Yom Kippur (the "body" of Torah Tidbits does also), and updated
Kaparot page with explanations, discussion, procedure, and text.
There is a candle lighting page. No
matter how many years of experience you have in lighting candles, there is
always a value in having the text of the Brachot and Y'HI RATZON in front of
you. Also, there is a valuable introduction which reminds you of the
memorial candles AND the extra 24-hr candle that are customarily lit before
lighting YK candles. The page contains useful details for veteran and
beginner alike.
There is a page with the blessings for
our children. Regardless of whether you regularly bless your children on
Friday night or not, it is a beautiful idea to bless them as Yom Kippur
approaches. The text provided here contains pairs of words for son/daughter
- we hope that it is readable and not that confusing.
There is a 2-sheet, 8-page VIDUI, which
many TT readers have used and appreciated for the past several Yom Kippurs.
Even though it might look like last years, it was gone over and polished
anew. To best use it, we recommend pulling out the two sheets and putting
them into your machzor.
When you finish the main part of the
Amida with the end of the SHALOM bracha, you can close your machzor and then
use the VIDUI sheets for the rest of the Amida. In order to give the VIDUI a
little more room in its 2 sheets, you will find the introduction on the next
page, rather than as part of the 8-pager. Also, we have reversed the
direction of the 8-pager to read from right to left, even though there is a
lot of English on those pages.
There is a havdala page with an
explanation of the unique rules for the candle. Once again, even veterans
will benefit from the reminders contained on that page.
And we have included (as in past years)
the special Shir shel HaYom for Yom Kippur according to Minhag Yerushalayim.
GMAR CHATIMA TOVA
Kaparot
KAPAROT is a custom that dates back to the time of the Gaonim.
Traditionally, one uses a chicken - rooster for a male, hen for a female,
(at least) one of each for a pregnant woman. Through the years, there were
problems with improper attention paid to the slaughter of the chickens, due
to the large demand for slaughter on Erev YK. Since Kaparot chickens were to
be prepared and given to poor people, there developed in some communities
the practice of using money instead, which is given to TZEDAKA, thereby
seeing to the needs of the poor and alleviating the abovementioned problem.
KAPAROT is often misunderstood. It is NOT
a shortcut to atonement. For real atonement, we must approach HaShem with
sincere repentance, mitzvot and good deeds, prayer and fasting. KAPAROT is a
sobering reminder of the frailty of life, an inspiration to T'shuva, AND a
way of involving us in G'MILUT CHASADIM before Yom Kippur.
Ideally, "do" Kaparot on Erev Yom Kippur
in the morning. The text on this page is meant for those who use money
rather than chickens. Those who use chickens (or fish) can find the standard
text in a Machzor or Siddur.
Many people use a multiple of CHAI, such as 1.80, 3.60, 5.40... 18.00š, etc.
Some suggest that the amount taken for KAPAROT should at least be the cost
of a chicken. The money should ideally be given to TZEDAKA before Yom
Kippur. Shuls provide collection plates at Mincha on Erev Yom Kippur for
that purpose.
Hold the money in your right hand and say
the following passage 3 times:
Next, wave your hand with the money in a circular motion over your head
while saying the first 3 word-pairs below, then finish the statement. Repeat
a second and third time.
Candle lighting for Yom Kippur, Sunday, October 5th
It is customary to light memorial candles for one's departed parents before
lighting Yom Kippur candles. An additional 24-hr. candle is lit "for the
living". This candle also provides the "Flame that Rested" for Havdala. See
further.
Candles are lit in the "usual" manner: light them, cover your eyes, make the
brachot, then open your eyes and "benefit" from the light. When a woman
lights Yom Kippur candles, she accepts upon herself all the restrictions of
Yom Kippur - both the Fast Day aspect as well as the Shabbat-work
restrictions. If there is a compelling reason to do so, a woman may make a
(mental/verbal) condition that she is not yet taking upon herself Yom Kippur
with the lighting. In such a case, she should NOT say SHE'HE'CHE'YANU with
lighting (she does say L'HADLIK), but waits until shul to say it with the
congregation, after Kol Nidrei and before Maariv.
A woman who says SHE'HE'CHE'YANU at
candle lighting, does not repeat it in shul.
She should, of course, answer AMEN when
the Chazan and congregation says it.
There are opinions that no bracha is to
be said for YK candles. The prevalent practice, however, is to say brachot.
It is proper that one should use the light of Yom Kippur candles upon return
from shul in order to justify the bracha.
Remember: No handling them, but perhaps
one can read a bit by the lights, prepare for bed, or something like that.
Havdala for Motzei Yom Kippur, Monday, October 6th
Uniquely different from Motza'ei Shabbat, the Havdala candle for Yom Kippur
should be lit from a flame that "rested" over Yom Kippur, rather than one
that is lit from a struck match. The flame is called NER SH'SHAVAT The role
of the candle on Motza'ei Shabbat is to commemorate the gift of fire from
HaShem to Adam and Chava on the very first Motza'ei Shabbat. Therefore, we
light the havdala candle with fire that we produce "fresh" for the occasion.
On Motza'ei Yom Kippur (that is not also Motza"Sh), the use of the candle in
havdala makes the point that during Yom Kippur, we were forbidden to handle
fire. This point is made by using a flame that was lit BEFORE Yom Kippur and
remained untouched throughout Yom Kippur in fulfillment of the rules of the
day, and then used in the havdala to announce, so to speak, the fact that
the day is done.
If the Havdala-maker drank a sufficient
amount of wine for an "after bracha" (which is desirable), he says this:
SHIR SHEL HAYOM L'YOM KIPPUR
Minhag Yerushalayim is to say this Psalm (32) instead of the regular Monday
SHIR.
Some say it in addition to the regular
Yom Sheini Psalm. Others say only Monday’s.
Introduction to VIDUI “verbal confession”
When you finish the main body of the Amida - with HAMEVARECH ET AMO YISRAEL
BASHALOM - Mincha of Erev Yom Kippur, and Maariv, Shacharit, Musaf, Mincha
of Yom Kippur (Ne'ila has different text), you can put your Machzor down and
use the 8-page VIDUI, found herein. The text has been supplemented by
English MEANINGS (rather than translations) to help focus your KAVANA while
saying this important part of the YK davening. Also, added to each word of
the ASHAMNU part of VIDUI are other sins associated with the same letter of
the Alef-Bet, which the CHAYEI ADAM and other sources recommend be on one's
mind, in one's heart, (and from one's lips), during VIDUI. The alphabetical
presentation of ASHAMNU does not mean that there are only 24 sins or kinds
of sin; rather, it is meant to convey that we - as individuals and as a
community - have sinned "from A to Z". The letter KAF, for example, stands
for KIZAVNU, we have deceived. But KAF also stands for other sins, such as
anger (KA’AS), being ungrateful (KAFUI TOV), not paying wages on time,
calling others by pejorative nicknames, and more. These too require T’SHUVA
and VIDUI. It brings to mind an old Peanuts comic strip, where Lucy
"helpfully" prepared a list of Chalie Brown's shortcomings for him. She
tells him that she alphabetized them for his convenience. The fact that
every single letter of the Alef-Bet has several entries on the list of sins,
certainly makes a strong point for us.
This presentation of VIDUI will hopefully
be of help towards a more meaningful VIDUI. VIDUI is NOT just tapping the
left side of your chest with your fist as you rattle off the ABCs of sin. It
should be taken seriously - and slowly - as a verbalization of one's
thoughts and feelings of T'shuva. Sometimes, this verbalization follows the
T'shuva process that has already taken place in one's heart and with one's
improved actions. Sometimes, the VIDUI is the starting point - that which
calls your attention to areas of behavior and thought that need improvement.
Either way - BOTH ways, VIDUI is an essential part of the T'shuva process.
Verbalization is often that which allows one to focus on personal
shortcomings and embark on the road to repentance and/or to firm up one's
resolve to repent.
Remember, T'shuva is one of the greatest
gifts from G-d to His people. It is the expression of His Divine Mercy and
Love. If He did not want us to straighten ourselves out, He would simply
punish us without giving us a second (and third and fourth and fifth...)
chance to repent. Our motivations for T'shuva should be fear AND love of
G-d. The challenge is awesome, but it is always possible for one to change
for the better. Step by step. Never be discouraged by what seems to be too
formidable a task. Be encouraged by the fact that this is what G-d wants of
us - not to punish us, but for us to return to Him in strengthened faith, in
better performance of mitzvot - qualitatively and quantitatively, and to
more carefully avoid the pitfalls of sin - against G-d and in our
interaction and conduct with our fellow human beings and Jews - parents,
children, spouses, family, friends, colleagues, and strangers.
The pasuk YIH-YU L'RATZON (YL) is T'hilim 19:15 and appears twice in
siddurim and machzorim at the end of each Amida, once right after
HA'MEVARECH ET AMO YISRAEL BASHALOM, which is the end of the 19, 7, or 9
brachot that make up the Amida (weekday, Shabbat & Yom Tov, RH Musaf
respectively) and then again right before one takes three steps back to
conclude the "full" Amida, with the addition of ELOKI NETZOR and, in our
case of Yom Kippur davening, the whole VIDUI section. The situation is best
understood by saying that the "original" Amida was "just" the set of brachot,
3 brachot of praise and description at the beginning, 3 brachot of thanks
and acknowledgement at the end, and 13, 1, or 3 middle brachot.
Then, our Sages appended other passages
to the Amida, in essence extending the Amida until we close it with YL and
then our steps back. Some say YL in both places, in other words, before and
after VIDUI. If this is your minhag, then continue to do so. There is a
strong argument for the other opinion, namely to say it only at the end
(right before taking the steps back), which makes VIDUI more a part of the
Amida than an appendix to it. However, if one needs to "interrupt" VIDUI for
K'DUSHA, Kaddish, or the like, then you should say YL wherever you are up
to, join the congregation in K'DUSHA saying the 3 main K'DUSHA p'sukim, or
respond to Kaddish, etc. and then continue saying VIDUI. YL is then said
again at the end. In other words, this second opinion is to say YL only once
at the end of VIDUI, unless necessary, as above.
In this opening passage of VIDUI, we ask G-d that our prayers come before
Him and that He not ignore them. We also say that we are not chutzpadik or
stubborn enough to claim that we are free of sin, but the fact is that we
(and our ancestors) have sinned. This simple statement is the first step to
T'shuva - we have sinned.
For each of the following 24 "terms of sin", one symbolically strikes the
left side of his/her chest with the right fist. Before or after saying the
word itself, sight-read (or say) the English text and allow your mind and
heart to really become part of the VIDUI process by backing up your words.
Don't hesitate to actually say more than the text - in any language - adding
personal prayers, thoughts, and feelings. Talk to G-d. This is a special
time to do that. (Don't worry about being slower than others.)
The first part of the English text is based on the word itself. Then, in
[square brackets] are SOME of the items included by Rabbi Moshe Sternbach in
HaDerech L'T'shuva. Remember that the connection is based on the Alef-Bet,
which might not be obvious from the English.
Also, keep in mind that we must repent
once-in-a-while violations - not just whole behavior patterns. E.g. "We have
eaten questionable foods." This is not just for a person who doesn't keep
kosher; it is also for a person who is strictly kosher, but once in a rare
while will say "this product is PROBABLY okay even without a Hashgacha",
etc. Or - one is usually sensitive to the feelings of others, but thought
something was SO funny, that he just had to share it with others. Etc. Etc.
Etc.
We have become guilty... of a whole variety of sins. What we have done was
not necessarily to rebel against G-d, but we nonetheless are devastated by
our behavior
[We have eaten - forbidden foods, questionable foods, without brachot,
without proper manners and concern for others; there is something lacking in
our faith in G-d (even just sometimes); we don't always say Amen properly,
we have a cruel streak...]
We have betrayed G-d by not doing His mitzvot properly and by doing certain
sins ina way that is disloyal to G-d; we have betrayed family & friends
[We have wasted prayer and Torah study time; we were not careful with Milk &
Meat; we relied on ourselves sometimes to the exclusion of trusting in G-d;
we have said "sloppy" brachot; we have belittled parents, teachers,
scholars, friends; we have wasted time...]
We have stolen — things, time, someone’s sleep, ideas; we have deceived
others
[We have been arrogant; wrongly took credit for something; harmed or annoyed
others; not raised our children properly; have not been strict enough about
sexual behavior; have not repaid kindnesses properly...]
We have slandered — G-d (by questioning His justice and kindness) andpeople.
We has said one thing and meant something else.
[We have gossiped, defamed, used vulgarities, spoken disrespectfully,
shouted - misused the power of speech; not given people the benefit of the
doubt...]
Remember: whether habitual behavior or once in a while, T'shuva is
necessary.
We have caused perversion, corrupted others
[We have entertained improper thoughts — during davening, Torah learning, or
in general;we have davened without kavana; burdened others; encroached on
another's "space"; looked at indecent pictures, literature, etc.]
And we have caused wickedness; caused others to sin
[we have neglected to be properly respectful of G-d; showed lack of concern
for thepossessions of others; said we're sorry without trying to mean it;
fomented dissent; joined with others and wasted time on nonsense...]
We have sinned intentionally, and then have rationalized our behavior
(making T'shuva all the more difficult)
[We have taken G-d's Name in vain; been careless about ritual washing of our
hands; been disrespectful to our parents; we "ate like pigs"; mingled
immodestly; threw food around...]
We have extorted; we have taken advantage of those weaker than us; we have
pressured others to give in to us
[we have caused Chilul HaShem; we have falsely flattered others; thought bad
thoughts; unjustly suspected others of wrongdoing; desecrated the Shabbat;
not paid our debts; desired (in an unhealthy manner) the possessions of
others...]
We have "attached" ourselves to falsehood; lying has become a part of our
lives; we have accused others falsely; compounded lies by lying more; hung
out with the "wrong crowd"
[we have given erroneous opinions and advice; defiled ourselves and others;
handled Muktza on Shabbat or Yom Tov; belittled Good and chosen Bad...]
We have give evil counsel; we have abused the trust of others; advised
others in ways that are not in their best interest
[we have secluded ourselves improperly with members of the opposite sex;
joined others in time-wasting activities; knowingly sinned; lacked proper
reverence & awe for G-d...]
We have been deceitful; made intentionally misleading statements; false
promises; have not tried hard enough to keep our promises
[we have made HaShem angry at us; been ungrateful; intended to harm others
(even if we didn't); wasted time; delayed paying wages; called others "put
down" nicknames...]
We have clowned around about matters that we should have treated seriously;
we have ridiculed good people; we've made a joke of things that prevents us
fromproper repentance because we don't take things seriously enough
[we have not learned Torah properly; worn Shaatnez; not been kind &
charitable; not been meticulous about mitzvot & halacha; not been scrupulous
in our dealings with others...]
We have rebelled; defied G-d's will; sinned because of lack of complete
faith
[we have held others back from doing mitzvot; not behaved properly in
business...]
We have angered G-d by disregarding His mitzvot, etc.
[we violated promises and vows; took revenge and bore grudges; benefited
from this world without brachot; were lazy in Torah learning and service of
HaShem...]
We have turned away, ignored our responsibilities to G-d (and to our
fellows)
[we have turned from from Jewish customs; contradicted our parents or Torah
authorities; dealt with contraband; forgiven others in word, but not in our
hearts...]
We have been perverse and have sinned because of perverted reasoning; we
have deliberately sinned to gratify our desires
[we have been falsely modest; a burden to our spouse; we were insensitive to
orphans & widows; we have violated (minor) prohibitions...]
We have acted wantonly; we have denied the validity of (some) mitzvot; we
basically believe in G-d and Torah, but have disregarded a specific mitzva
[we have rejected the Yoke of Heaven; we were afraid to reproach someone; we
turned our hearts to idleness; we opened someone else's mail; we lacked fear
of sin...]
We have persecuted others; caused others to suffer; been callous to others
[we have distressed our family members; we put our needs before G-d's...]
We have been stubborn; we have refused to see G-d's Hand in life; we
haveignored or denied that what happens in this world is not chance, but G-d's
Will
[we have been jealous of others; been stingy with Tzedaka; read improper
books; listened to and accepted Lashon HaRa; not been careful with Kriyat
Sh'ma...]
T'shuva includes: recognition of sin, stopping sinful behavior, reret for
having sinnes, commitment not to continue to sin, VIDUI
We have been wicked; done sins that are particularly identified with
wickedness, such as hitting others, stealing, planning to sin
[we have pursued honor; quarreled for no good reason; ran after
temptations...]
We have corrupted our character; been arrogant; been extremely angry; vulgar
- sins which affect one's character
[we have lied; forgotten G-d and our commitment to Him; were silent when we
should have objected;gloated over another's misfortune; hated others;
squandered physical & spiritual energies...]
We have been abominable; have become loathsome to G-d; immorality;
idolatry;haughtiness; anger
[we have desired sinful things; belittled the Torah; we did not take the
opportunity to repent; were not careful with our T'filin; were sloppy with
davening...]
We have strayed; drifted further away from G-d rather than getting closer to
Him
You have let us go astray (we lost the merit to benefit from Your help); we
havemisused freedom of choice for ourselves and caused others to do the same
In summary...
We have veered from Your mitzvot and good rules, and that hasn't been worth
it at all. We acknowledge that Your judgments against us are just, because
You act truthfully and we have brought evil upon ourselves. (Nonetheless,
please forgive us...)
What can we say to You, G-d; You know everything; nothing is hidden before
You...
Therefore, may it be Your will that You forgive, pardon, and atone our many
sins...
After summarizing, we once again use an alphabetical format (this time it’s
a double alphabetical arrangement) to enumerate a multitude of sins. And
once again, the custom is to strike the heart (left side of the chest) for
each AL CHEIT...
For the sin that we have sinned before You...
accidentally (or under duress) and willingly - even when we don't mean to
sin, we still have to repent, for it indicates some lack in us that a sin
was done by us. How much more so, when it is intentional
through hardness of the heart - refusing to admit that we might be wrong
often results in sin. We have to be more humble...
through ignorance - lack of Torah learning results in doing the wrong thing.
Rather than plead ignorance, we must strive for greater knowledge
with words - many sins, especially related to misuse of the power of speech,
such as flippant oaths, cursing, gossip. We must be more careful of what
emerges from our lips...
in public or in private - sins in public are potential desecration of G-d's
Name; sins in private often indicate fear of what others will think, but a
disregard for what G-d thinks. Both are bad.
through immorality - this includes a wide variety of sins and includes the
sins themselves as well as that which a person does that causes lust and
leads to the more serious sins...
with harsh speech - generally, this refers to misuse of the power of speech
in all forms; specifically, it refers to speaking harshly to someone and
unjustly hurting his feelings.
with knowledge and deceit - refers to using our knowledge in order to
deceive and take advantage of others. We also can deceive ourselves.
through thoughts - this includes fantasizing about sin; such thoughts are
the root of sin and also interfere with Torah learning and davening. One
cannot say that he was only THINKING but not doing wrong.
through wronging a fellow - deceiving, taking advantage of a friend, etc.;
also refers to unfair treatment in business
by insincere confession - T'shuva must be "in your mouth and in your heart,
to do..." Let our words motivate us to sincere repentance and let our
sincere repentance be accompanied by proper VIDUI
in immoral gatherings - being part of a group whose conversations are
improper can easily lead one astray. "But everyone else was there!"
willfully and carelessly - even when we did not mean to sin, we have what to
repent - we should have been more careful, etc.
by belittling parents (in-laws, too) and teachers - this is not only
something we do or say, but even something we think. It all is wrong AND it
threatens the strength of the Chain of Tradition.
by exercising power - it is wrong to use one's power to intimidate others;
one must not arrogantly act superior over others.
through desecration of G-d's Name - this includes major Chilul HaShem as
well as relatively minor acts which cause a lowering of one's respect for
G-d or Torah.
through foolish speech - "why do we say stupid things sometimes?" One has to
repent this too, since speech is such a precious and powerful feature of
human beings. Foolish speech often leads to more sin.
through impure lips - this is one of several references to improper speech;
in this case, the subject is vulgar language and cursing.
with the Evil Inclination - we sometimes fail to fight our Yeitzer HaRa, and
rather flirt with it, then give in to it and follow it.
knowingly and unknowingly - we want to repent even sins that we are unaware
of having committed. Also, sins against others who know what we've done, or
don't even know what we've said about them
G-d's name ELOHA is pronouonced e-LO-ah (Ashkenazi) or e-LOwah (S'faradi) -
NOT ELOHA
For all of these sins, G-d of Forgiveness, forgive us, pardon us, atone for
us.
(These are different levels of forgiveness - commentators disagree on the
terminology. Basically, we ask G-d to forgive what we've done, not to punish
us for it, not to even hold a sin against us, and to completely erase it, as
if we never did it. Some beat fist over heart for S'LACH, M'CHAL, and KAPEIR)
by yielding to bribery - monetary bribery as well as flattery with ulterior
motives are insidious to honest dealings among people. Bribery and flattery
can blind one and cause a multitude of sins in its wake.
through denial and false promises - we have not been honest, neither with
G-d nor with our fellow human beings. Remember: this need not be a chronic
condition, we must repent even the minor instances of dishonestly.
with Lashon HaRa - another misuse of the power of speech. A particularly
serious sin because it often results in permanent damage to one's
reputation, even when groundless. "But it's true" is not an acceptable
excuse for Lashon HaRa. Neither is "I was only joking".
through fooling around - not taking someone's reproach of us seriously,
laughing it off, will impede T'shuva. Ridiculing others, joking at someone
else's expense are serious offenses.
in business - the laws of business ethics and proper behavior in the market
place are just as much a part of Halacha as is fasting on Yom Kippur. Since
it often causes a Chilul HaShem and because it is often disregarded by many,
it is to be treated very seriously.
with food & drink - one should not pat himself on the back for keeping
kosher; one needs to carefully answer the question: "Am I as careful and as
strict as I ought to be?" "Do I cut corners?" Included in this category of
sin is not making brachot properly, sloppy benching, careless washing for
meals, poor table manners, gluttony, stinginess with guests.
through interest and extortion - taking or paying interest on personal loans
is forbidden. Besides the sin, it causes one to become hard-hearted.
through haughtiness - arrogance is a particularly reprehensible character
trait. We must repent sins that result from it as well as work on ridding
ourselves of this negative characteristic.
with prying eyes - this includes looking at forbidden things, invasion of
privacy of others, expressing disapproval of others with a raised eyebrow
with idle chatter - yet another expression of the misuse of speech. Here it
can refer to davening and benching without kavana, as well as pointless and
time-wasting conversation.
with haughty eyes - looking down at others. This is parallel to the earlier
reference to haughtiness, a particularly negative trait.
with brazenness - acting without shame and a bit of natural embarrassment is
a contributory factor to a host of other sins
in throwing off the Yoke - we exist to learn Torah, perform mitzvot, and be
good people. Many sins come from shirking our responsibilities.
in judgment - refers to sins of unfair judgment, in the formal courtroom as
well as in everyday life. It even refers to judging G-d.
through entrapping a fellow - taking advantage of others, manipulating
people for our own purposes
through a begrudging eye - being jealous and stingy. Finding excuses for not
giving Tzedaka or being generous with others. Not helping others.
through lightheadedness - we are often frivolous. This is especially
inappropriate in shul and when learning Torah or davening.
with stubbornness - refusing to recognize that we might be wrong. Not
learning from experience. Not taking constructive criticism. This is a major
obstacle to T'shuva, and we must repent this in order to repent otherwise.
enthusiastically - One must examine his wrongdoings and see if there is the
added sin of doing them with a smile or with "licking one's lips".
by gossiping - The prohibition includes Lashon HaRa and character
assassination, but also includes telling tales "just like this" with no
intention to hurt anyone. It is all too frequent that people get hurt from
plain gossip.
through vain oaths - swearing falsely or frivolously can damage the
underpinnings of interpersonal relationships as well as being a serious lack
of respect to G-d. One has to be extremely careful in this regard.
through baseless hatred - do you hate a person when you should really be
hating the wrong things that he does?. This distinction is crucial for the
proper growth and development of Klal Yisrael.
in matters of "giving a hand" - we have been callous towards the needs of
others. Also, we have sometimes joined with others in evil.
through confusion - this refers to a diminished faith in G-d caused by not
seeing G-d's hand in everything and by doubting the validity of the Torah
and the authority of halacha.
After enumerating different kinds of sins, we ask for forgiveness of sins
according to punishment and style:
For sins which would require a sacrifice in the Beit HaMikdash, then for
those which one gets corporal or capital punishment from Beit Din, or
penalties from Heaven.
Then we mention sins of commission and omission, sins we know about and
those of which we - but not G-d - are unaware
G-d, before I was born, I was nothing. Now that I have been born, it's as if
I wasn't... May it be Your will...
In addition to the pasuk for your name (if that is your custom), use this
point, right before you conclude the Amida to talk some more to G-d.
Take your three steps back
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